Petulia

The very first thing Petulia ever said to me was, "Do you know I've been married six months and I've never had an affair?”
“Are you married?” she asked.
“No.”
“What a shame. I’d hate to have an affair with an unmarried man. I think there ought to be some equality of guilt. Don’t you?”
“Definitely.”
“You don’t seem particularly heartbroken. I’ve just turned you down, do you know that?”
“No.”
“Well I am. What’s your name?”
“Archie.”
“Mine’s Petulia. Why don’t you get married quick and call me...it’s the least you could do. How many propositions have you had this evening?”
“Actually four.”
“Who are they? I’ll tear their eyes out.”
“Now you’re talking.”